This ONE THING truly breaks my heart when I teach my students.

I have students that I work 1:1 with from as early as the age of 2. Some of these students stay with me until they are 11. We work together for a very long time. Working with children on a 1:1 basis really allows me to get to know each and every one on a deeper level. I get to know what they like and what they dislike. I get to know their struggles and the things that they find easier to do.

I am able to support them in a way that no other teacher in any sort of school is able to. That’s not to take away from teachers that work at schools at all so please do not read it in that way. I worked in schools for over 15 years and I know how hard school teachers work every single day. But it’s very hard to support students the way that I support them 1:1 (even though I only see my students weekly) because school teachers are working with 16-30+ children every single day!).

Here is what typically happens that truly breaks my heart. When I work with students for a very long time, I see them from a very young age. At such a young age, they are not afraid to make mistakes. They give me answers with such confidence even if they are completely wrong. And they don’t care. They just listen to me asking them to try again and that’s exactly what they do. They laugh it off, they don’t take it to heart. It really just doesn’t matter!

As my students get older, I start to notice a shift. Now, of course all children are different and I am certainly not generalising but this is what tends to happen.

It gets to a point where we are in a lesson together and I tell them that one of their answers is wrong or that they need to try again and their behaviour changes. They’ll get teary. They’ll tell me that they don’t want to cross out the ‘wrong’ answer. They’ll get defensive with me. They’ll tell me that I’m wrong! They won’t listen to me explaining to them how to do it/change it.

This is heart breaking.

And this is something to really pay attention to and ask questions about.

Why is my child reacting in this way?

What can I do to support them to see that it is absolutely fantastic to get things wrong?

Why is failure so bad at such a young age? I’m talking about between the ages of 6-11. That’s when the shift in attitude towards failure becomes more evident to me in my lessons with my students.

Support your child to understand that they must fail hundreds of times a day and that it is fine.

Celebrate ‘failures’ as much as you celebrate ‘successes’!

Let’s raise children who are happy and delighted to ‘fail’. This will set them up for far greater success in the future. Don’t you think?